Removing My Doubt

Slowly questioning my sanity....and laughing about it.

Somebody Else

I had another love that I had to let go.

He has been in my thoughts and my heart.

Although I never heard is voice or felt his touch,

I miss him.

How is it possible to be in love with two hearts,

with two men?

I am so torn and long for him.

He has found another.

My heart feel like it has been torn in half.

It will never be whole again.

I diminish.

Fade.

Nothing.

Lost.

I’ve always had this deep-down conviction that I’m not like everybody else, and there’s an amazingly exciting new life waiting for me just around the corner.

—Sophie Kinsella (via itookadeepbreath)

(Source: creatingaquietmind, via quote-book)

Anonymous asked: You can go straight to hell, its little less than what you deserve

Well talk about hate mail…what the bloody hell did I ever do to you!!!

Never…

This morning was beautiful. We both slept hours beyond the norm. Had a bite or two of breakfast and then things started to heat up….until…I went to the bathroom. You guessed it, that monthly visitor decided to show up early! I couldn’t stop crying and felt like such a child, but I was so frustrated…he talked to me, calmed me and held me while I cried. Such a patient and loving man. I’m still upset, mostly because I couldn’t do anything for him and selfishly because I can’t do anything with him and I’m horny as hell…sometimes, and I know this sounds childish, I fucking hate being a woman.

I spent another day alone. Did the shopping alone and was dog tired when I got home. I hate smiling and looking happy when I feel there is no reason to. Why can’t I tell him how I feel? Why is it when I’m lying next to him, cuddled up and warm, I can’t tell him anything?

—I hate feeling so alone when there is someone sleeping right next to me.

If you can capture a woman’s imagination, then you will have her. But imagination is a strange creature. It needs time and distance to function properly.

Screaming in Silence

The loneliness I feel is beyond measure.  My body is cold and I am blind to the world around me.  Please won’t someone rescue me from this prison?  I am trapped and can find no doors.  There is no light, only the inky blackness reflected by my soul.  I cannot feel my heart beat.  I am alone and faceless.

Fate, Destiny or Hell

I’ve walked into something.

My dreams do not stop,

even while I’m awake.

Fate that I answered

his letter,

destiny that we

have fallen in love,

or hell

because I am

I am

not myself.